


Liches Get Stitches

by maxsaystowrite



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: M/M, Spoilers, The Suffering Game, spoilers?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-19
Updated: 2017-01-19
Packaged: 2018-09-18 15:18:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,331
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9390638
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maxsaystowrite/pseuds/maxsaystowrite
Summary: Taako is on the verge of death in Wonderland and Kravitz is determined to prevent it. Though, when he finally makes it in, will he be too late? Or does Taako have another trick up his sleeve?





	

**Author's Note:**

> As my beta reader said "the angsty kravitz/taako fic you've all been waiting for, you're welcome."

_ “Taako!” _

 

Kravitz heard it first, then, he felt it. His weak spirit, the blood coming up his throat, the will to keep going trying to break through the physical limitations. Taako’s flame may be going strong, but his wick was cut short. His cloak surrounded him and his flesh melted away to bone. He sliced through the air with his arm, ripping open a portal.

 

He stepped through, but he wasn’t in front of Taako. He was balancing on the spinner of a giant roulette wheel. Kravitz, along with other reapers, had been here before. Wonderland was an insult to the goddess of death.  Souls that should have passed on were trapped and still forced to suffer, even when they have nothing left to give but their lamentation. Not to mention the liches themselves escape death entirely.  No reaper had been able to penetrate the walls. Reapers didn’t have anything to lose, and nothing to gain.

 

“The fools…” Kravitz sighed.

 

“How  _ interesting _ ,” The voice came from below Kravitz, though he knew who it was before he looked down. Edward floated up to him, all his pageantry was left in the building, couldn’t be bothered to keep up the elvan facade outside of Wonderland. “Welcome back to Wonderland, Kravitz.”

 

“Let me go to them, I don’t have time for your nonsense today.”

 

Edward laughed and the building below Kravitz’s feet shook. 

 

“Oh, honey, you know that’s not how this works. You’re going to have to sacrifice  _ something _ for your greatest desire.” 

 

Kravitz felt blood rush to his face, the first time in a long time. “I don’t have a greatest desire, I’m a reaper. No earthly possession can tempt me.”

 

Edward clicked his tongue. “There’s no use lying, not with the bell around.” Billboards appeared suddenly, surrounding them, closing them in. Kravitz’s heart skipped a beat when he saw Taako’s face plastered on every surface. He was laying on his stomach with his head in his hands and ankles crossed behind him. “See? No use.”

 

Kravitz out stretched his arm, his scythe sliding out from his sleeve. “Let me in, Edward. Or I’ll have to use force.” He raised the blade to the liches’ nonexistent throat.

 

Edward had no facial expression, but his voice sounded bored. “I already told you, you’ll have to sacrifice something.”

 

His grip tightened on the scythe. “I don’t  _ have  _ anything to give you.” He pushed the blade further into the robe.

  
  


Edward sighed and the billboards started to flip. The Taako on them now was horrific. Blood was dried on his face and clothes, wounds seeped all over him, his legs mangled and weak. The only strength Kravitz saw was in his eyes and his grip on the umbra staff.

  
  


“That simply isn’t true,” His voice sounded amused and the red light in the void of his hood began to glow brighter. Kravitz felt violated, like someone had just read his mind, or his greatest fears were plastered on the walls. Panic wracked his entire body. The glow faded slightly. “Maybe we can clear out some of those human memories. You’re a grown reaper. Do you really need those pesky memories of your mother?”

  
  
  
  
  
  


Taako spat up another pool of blood, covering the floor around him. If he didn’t make it out of this hell hole, he’ll make his existence hard to forget. Magnus was standing in front of him, guarding him. Merle was flipping through his bible, trying to find some sort of loophole. 

 

A rift tore through dark that surrounded them in the combat room, Kravitz stepped through. He seemed dazed, unstable on his feet.

 

“Kravitz?” Magnus called.

 

“Oh, that isn’t a good sign.” Merle said, flipping through even faster.

 

Kravitz looked towards Magnus and spotted Taako on the ground. The fear and worry sobered him up as he ran to Taako’s side. He placed a cold hand on his back and the other on his arms, to support him.

 

Taako laughed, then coughed, but smiled through the blood and pain. “I know them clammy hands when I feel ‘em.” He spit out some blood. “I thought I had a little more time before I bit the dust.”

 

“You’re not going to die, Taako. I won’t take you…” Kravitz said. “I’m here to help.”

 

Taako snorted. “Yeah, darling, the thing is, unless you can give me some of that sweet HP, I’m gonna have to ghost, my dude.”

 

“Don’t talk like that, Taako, you won’t-”

 

“Oh, but he might,” The elves said in unison. Their eyes glued on Taako. “He’s not looking so good.”

 

The party’s attention was drawn to Taako as he hurled up another wave of blood. His body shaking, almost glitching. White snakes of light sparked from the umbra staff, still clutched in his hands, and crawled all over him.

 

The umbra staff slipped from his hands for only a moment, opening and closing rapidly with a mind of its own, before Taako snatched it up again, bringing it to his chest. 

 

“Oh! Lydia! Do you remember when  _ we _ -”

 

“Of  _ course _ I do! One of the best moments of my life!”

 

“And we get to  _ see _ it happen!”

 

“How  _ exciting _ !”

 

Kravitz moved his arms around Taako, pulling him close. He could feel the energy coursing through his veins.  He could feel what Taako’s soul was trying to do,  what the umbra staff was trying to do. 

 

“Taako,  you can't-”

 

“I can’t leave them here… I can’t leave them… I have to finish… I have to  _ beat _ them… I  _ promised _ .” Taako nearly snarled. His heart was pounding, he could feel himself slipping away. He could hear the umbra staff and its willingness to help. It was a tempting offer.

 

“You can’t reverse this, Taako, you can’t come back from this.” Kravitz begged.

 

Taako turned his head to look at Kravitz. A smile crept onto his face, causing Kravitz to smile despite everything.

 

“Why are we smiling?” Kravitz asked softly, transfixed by Taako’s gaze. Maybe the bell was right. May his heart did desire just one thing.

 

Taako somehow smiled wider. “I wanted your handsome mug to be the last thing I saw with my OG eyes.”

 

Kravitz’s face fell. “Taako-”

 

There was a bright light, blinding Magnus and Merle. Kravitz, Edward and Lydia, didn’t have organic eyes, the light didn’t bother them. They could see exactly what was happening to Taako. His body slipped from Kravitz’s grasp, floating to the middle of the room. They watched as the magic from the umbra staff poured out of the confining metal and cloth, becoming it’s own entity. It came face to face with Taako, only the two of them knew what it had said, before Taako nodded to it. The mass of magic moved towards Taako, seeping over his face, his body, his entirety. Sutures appeared on Taako’s edges, creating a bond, attaching them together. They appeared one at a time, as if someone were stitching the magic to him.

 

The light faded and Taako floated up right, umbra staff now clutched in his hand. His head down, as if he was somehow weakened by the ritual. Every tiny cut and wound he was was now healed, the blood on his clothes was scrubbed away, he was perfect again.  His feet touched the ground and without a beat, Edward and Lydia both had a hand on one of his shoulders.

 

“I guess you were  _ serious _ about that job application.” Lydia said.

 

“We’re happy to have another pair of hands around here!” Edward said.

 

The lights jerked from their position and all pointed at the three elves, creating sharp shadows with their pointed features. 

 

“ _ An extra pair of hands, an extra dollop of suffering. _ ” They said in unison. The two erupted into hideous laughter, uncontrollable, disgustingly pleased with themselves.

 

Magnus looked to Kravitz, who had his eyes locked onto Taako. “Kravitz, what do we do?

 

Kravitz stood, calm, and dusting off the knees of his pants. They were stained with Taako’s blood.

 

“Yeah, mr. grimm reaper, how do we kill liches?” Merle gripped an axe in his hands, in a defensive position. His stance seemed weak and unsure, like he had forgotten how to use it.

 

Taako looked up, his eyes glowing a bright white with a faint blue circling the outside. It contrasted the red of the liches. Edward and Lydia still cackled as Taako’s eye glowed brighter, his lips began to move as if he was uttering a spell, then halting.

 

“ _ Run _ !” He yelled suddenly at his party before casting Otiluke's Resilient Sphere on himself, and by extension, the two who had their hands on him. The pearly bubble encompassed them, cutting off all their magic affecting the outside world. 

 

Without their magic, Wonderland went bleak, no lights, no music. The building began to shake and the walls started to crumble around them. Magnus and Merle took the hit and ran towards the door from whence they came. Kravitz stood for a moment, watching the barely opaque bubble. Edward and Lydia’s elven facades had melted away, their glowing red faces and black robes exposed. They clawed at the bubble, trying to cast  _ something _ to get them out. Taako stood in the middle of it, still and without a sign of worry. Their eyes met. A small part of Kravitz melted as Taako gave him another smile and nodded at him.

 

_ I’m going to be fine _ , Kravitz heard inside his mind. Taako’s band of projected thought was glowing as he lifted his hand to the bubble. 

 

Kravitz wasn’t entirely sure he believed that, but it’s all he had to hold onto. Kravitz left with a smile, not for himself, but for Taako. The door Magnus and Merle had gone through, was now a hole in the wall. The sun was out, Merle and Magnus were blinking away the extra light as their eyes adjusted. 

 

“Kravitz… Did what I think happened just happen?” Magnus asked as he watched Wonderland shake and crumble in on itself. The others in Wonderland came pouring out, at least two people per pocket of the roulette wheel. The wheel leveled completely, exposing the other travelers, the bubble, and, in the center of all the ruble, the bell.

 

“I’m not so sure, Magnus.” Kravitz never broke his gaze from the bubble, trying to keep an eye on the liches inside. “Please, go get the bell before anyone else does.”

 

“Good idea, come on, Merle.” The pair went onward, doing their jobs as reclaimers and obtaining the bell. They went together, just in case one of them couldn’t resist the thrawl. 

 

Kravitz walked towards the bubble, there was movement inside and he needed to know what was happening. As he got closer, there was a flash of red. He was face to face with the bubble’s barrier when he saw only two figures, not three. Taako had his arm in Lydia’s hood. He jerked his hand back, out of Lydia’s hood, red bolts of magic followed it out. In his hand was a yellow gem, Lydia reached for it before Taako crushed it in his more powerful hands. Her outstretched skeletal hand disintegrated into dust, as did her cloak. She was reduced to nothing more than a pile of ashes on the bottom of the bubble, joining what Kravitz could only guess was Edward.

 

The bubble popped and the ashes took to the wind, mixing in with the air and catching on the trees. Taako watched them disappear. 

 

Kravitz took the opportunity to wrap his arms around Taako’s hips, hugging him from behind. Taako gasped and clapped his hands over Kravitz’s. He relaxed the moment he felt the temperature.

 

“Your popsicle hands are such a relief, pumpkin. That bubble was hot as hell with those two magical radiators.” Taako leaned into Kravitz, tucking his head under his chin. His eyes moved to Merle and Magnus who were placing the bell into Merle’s bag.

 

“What’s your soul attached to?” Kravitz asked. Lydia and Edward’s souls were attached to gems they kept inside their robes. Taako crushed them to kill them. No matter what Taako had become, his soul was bound to something.

 

Taako’s hands tightened their grip on Kravitz. “The umbra staff.”

 

“I’m not sure that was the smartest idea.”

 

“Well it’s not like I had time to  _ think  _ about it. I never  _ wanted  _ to be undead. Immortality takes all the fun out of it.”

 

“It?”

 

“Life.”

 

Magnus and Merle approached them with caution, eyeing Taako, wary. 

 

“Taako? Buddy?” Magnus said, inching towards. “Are you, you know, you?”

 

“ _ No _ , I’m the  _ other _ Taako, the one who never met you and doesn’t have to go back to the bureau of balance to deal with this shit.”

 

“Yeah he’s fine.” Merle muttered.

 

Magnus looked him up and down. Taako was back to perfection, not even a scratch on him. “What happened to you? How are you not, like, going power hungry or something? How are you still you?”

 

Taako sighed. “So there’s this thing called a Baelnorn? And it’s kind of like the exact same thing as a lich? But a lich defies death for selfish reasons and to gain more power or immortality? And a baelnorn defies death so they can finish a quest, or serve their family for like ever, you know, good shit.”

 

Magnus grew a huge smile across his aged face, his voice giddy as he bounced up and down. “Taako, are we your family?”

 

Taako’s face twisted in disgust, feeling the heat rush to his face. “No! Of course not! You two are here for the ride on my quest for glory to save the world! You’re the background characters to  _ my  _ story!”

 

The party erupted into laughter, taking Taako’s words in stride, knowing he doesn’t mean them. But the joy faded all at once when a question dawned upon all of them. 

 

“Taako… if you’re attached to the quest...” Merle pondered.

 

“Then what happens when we’ve found all the grand relics?” Magnus asked.

 

“That’s the million dollar question, isn’t it?”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! If you liked it leave a comment! This is my first Adventure Zone fic and I hope you've enjoyed it! I also have Yuri!!! On Ice, Voltron, Miraculous Ladybug, RWBY, Gravity Falls, Star Wars, and Kingsmen fics! Go read those if you're interested! Thank you so much!


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